Thursday, June 02, 2005

It's been so long

It's been so very long since I posted anything here, and lest you think I'm disinterested, I thought I had better. It's just that I have so very much on my platter (a plate no longer fits it all) and, on a daily basis, it seems, I try to imagine giving something up. But what? I'm saying that too much: But what?

Last night, as Travis warmed up with his soccer team before the game, I sat in the Sienna in the parking lot and I wrote in my Moleskine. Take your own advice! The words careened about my skull. So I wrote a couple of pages, then a minute before the game began, joined the other parents.

When I have too much to do, so much I'm committed to, it's hard to do any one thing well. I imagine I'd be a better_____ fill in the blank: parent, writer, teacher, blogger, deluxe gourmet veggie chef, knitter, artist, friend, if I didn't do so much. But I like it all, is my continual refrain.

What's a girl to do? If anyone out there has some good advice, send it my way. (And please, smart alecks...don't bother. I'll just hit "delete," anyhoo..... ; }

Coming up on this blog will be more Q&A's--soon by literary agent John Ware and author Amy Rosenthal Krouse, so do come back and visit often. I promise I won't be so lax and let my bloggie poo wither away.

3 comments:

your RI friend said...

Barbara--a wise woman once advised me to ask myself three questions:
Does it have to be done?
Does it have to be done right now?
and
Does it have to be done by me?
(are you already saying yes, yes and yes?)
At the time, I think we were talking about life with a newborn, but how did you get through that?
I made lists, put everything on them--even the seemingly impossible 4am things like "take a shower!"--but they only work if you limit the list to the one day you're on. And keep it detailed for the satisfaction of crossing many items off.
and ps. it is tempting to look at "specialists" or folks with one career and think if only, but some of us, given only one pursuit would not be a 'better' whatever...we'd be bored and that would reflect in both production and our interactions.
So I guess you are back to "follow your own advice" but what IS that again?
love,
pat

Barbara DeMarco-Barrett said...

Thank you, Pat! I needed that: "Does it have to be done right now?" I asked myself that question and realized a meeting I agreed to with another mom at Travis' school didn't have to be done today and I just rescheduled it for another day when I'll already be at up there. That helps my headache some! Now, if only I could figure out the rest of the stuff that does need to be done by me. Or do I only think it does? I did work on fiction first thing, at 6:45 a.m. so I feel a little better. Now to get Travis up for school.....

Toni Evans said...

Barbara--as a mother of four kids spread far enough apart to attend four schools, as someone with a part-time job outside the home and part-time attempt at writing, as well as myriad church and outside activities, let me just say this: May for mothers is all about survival. I find it even more taxing on my time and patience than December. End of year banquets, recitals, concerts, awards nights, holidays, weddings, showers, graduations, anniversaries, field trips.... I find that if I can get through May, June corrects many of the problems without me lifting a finger. I have also recently resigned from four or five things. I told the very useful and worthy groups that it was temporary and wouldn't take effect until September. That took the guilt from me, gave them time to replace me, and since I really believe in the volunteer/activities, I do plan to resume them. I am 'taking a year off'. It is working for me.